yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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