What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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