woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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