Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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