Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
