Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
