he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
