Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist http://tfl.nu/e75m
  Replies (19) Good night (6870) Bad night (712)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI http://tfl.nu/lcvv
  Replies (24) Good night (6683) Bad night (1919)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out. http://tfl.nu/l8yc
  Replies (20) Good night (4665) Bad night (997)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid http://tfl.nu/xma9
  Replies (48) Good night (7744) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'. http://tfl.nu/510f
  Replies (26) Good night (5123) Bad night (2110)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (514): The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you. http://tfl.nu/k985
  Replies (44) Good night (7677) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee http://tfl.nu/m4t7
  Replies (33) Good night (1428) Bad night (4209)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you. http://tfl.nu/6h34
  Replies (17) Good night (2047) Bad night (2497)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker. http://tfl.nu/xtlj
  Replies (9) Good night (1831) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (514): I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me http://tfl.nu/t69r
  Replies (2) Good night (1827) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.

  (360): View more from Washington

  It was me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who. (360): It was me. http://tfl.nu/kgk9
  Replies (3) Good night (2658) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless. http://tfl.nu/wul6
  Replies (6) Good night (837) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him http://tfl.nu/pxxc
  Replies (5) Good night (650) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language http://tfl.nu/6y9g
  Replies (5) Good night (683) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera http://tfl.nu/o2wd
  Replies (3) Good night (431) Bad night (172)

Randomize