I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
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