whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
