i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
