Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize