I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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