piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
this will be a night to untag.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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