I want to walk on stilts...naked
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
