Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
