I think I just saw someone hide a body.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize