do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize