you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
