so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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