On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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