Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
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