I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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