I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
it's like iHOP with fire
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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