KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He shit in the fireplace
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
