Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
