I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
