If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
