She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
