I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i just google imaged poop.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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