found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
