that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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