He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
