I hate all girls vehemently.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
