He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Randomize
