Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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