kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
