i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
