They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
