he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
