i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
