We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
