Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
