At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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