The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
