The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
