I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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