even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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