I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
