So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
