Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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